well i have been babysitting my cousis all day and im soo tired...but anyways i might go to ceider point next week let me know if u wanna hook up and come!
      anyways this is my chance to go out and get wat i want befor it is to late...i just dont want to fall flat on my face....if u want something bad enough u just have to go out and get it! you have to risk everything! that is wat im doing!

i get wat i want! haha...i love you and im saying this with meaning!

*love*me*

[	mood	|	drained	]
[	music	|	will smith- switch	]

hey...i just got back form florida! it was awsome...the weather was perfect, good enough to get a tan but u wernt sweating! ;) well i met this guy there his name was Jordan he was 17 (ya i know old but he didnt seem like he was that old and he was only a junior) haha, and his cousin that was pretty weird...so ya he was pretty cool and a HOTTIE....someone else to hang out w/ besides my sister and cousins...wanna know more ask bc im not gonna type it all in here (too much)haha...i would have thought that meeting someone else would have helped me get my mid off of ***** but it really didnt.....Jordan actually was alot like ***** even my sister noticed that.....mabey that is why i liked him so much....but anyways im gonna be so busy the rest of the summer w/ babysitting my cousin (she is not even 2 and she is the cutest {smartest} 2 year old) and then trainign w/ meg and helana and Lightning...and then doing drivers tranning August 1-18 i cant wait for the im so excited.....meg and mel that is gonna be a blast!!!!!!.....  well i g2g finish unpacking....i will probly get some pics....check out my myspace at http://www.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=13509439&Mytoken=20050526134744

*love*me*

[	mood	|	confused	]
[	music	|	Hazel eyes-Kelly Clarkson	]

sooo ya i was mad....but i think i have gotten over it...i just relized that i got screwed over!!! i really sont know wat im sapposed to say...im confused (not upset) bc we were saposed to get "together" when summer finaly came soo that we could spend some time together....but i guess you just couldnt wait one more day for me...:( im not trying to be mean but u two barly even talk...all u do is make out...then wat really bugs me is when we went put-put (spell?) you acted like nothing happened....

but anyways im over him....i had a long talk w/ my 2nd father....and we were talking about used cars(boys) and how he thinks that i just thought that the car (YOU) would always be ther for me and that is why i didnt go after it right a way....but the truth is i had a conversation w/ my car(YOU) and we agreed that we would wait till summer untill i purched the car (YOU)...but someone came along that he thought was prettier, nicer, funnier, sweeter than me (and she has a pool :0)..........so wat have i learned form this lesson...that he is not worth this pain...especially if he could wait for me

*love*me*

[	mood	|	pissed off	]
[	music	|	to pissd to find a song	]

wow!!! i dont know wat to do!!!!!!!! im soo freking pissed off right now....why would u jsut tell me....if it was bc u thought i would get mad....i would but i wouldnt be a frekin mad as i am now...grrrrr i thought we were gonna wait till summer to get together...wat happend to that? why her? how long have u known her? could u not wait? i dont know why i go through all this shit!!!! you make me sooo mad that i wanna die....but yet im still here waiting for you!! why do i do this to myself.....are you really worth all of this!!! I have nothing else to say!!!

*love*me*

RIGHT NOW I FUCKIN HATE YOU!!!!

[	mood	|	drained	]
[	music	|	50 Cent-Just a lil bit	]

today was nothing fun...i sat around the house and cleaned....and then went outside for like an hour to try to get some sun....(it was soo hot i was sweating like a pig) haha gross!!...so ya tomorrow i wont be able to writ n here, so here are my plans....im going to a soccer game in the middle of who knows were (riding with the hot and sexy megan) then going to get my legs waxed OUCH!....i know that sounds grose but it for the best......then im going out to dinner w/ my grandma who i havent seen in like 2 months....and probly be home around 10....wat a fun day i have planed!! ; ) make sure you vist my myspace.....at   http://www.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=13509439&Mytoken=20050610171845 ...and comment on the hot pictures of ME!!

*love*ME*

[	mood	|	bouncy	]
[	music	|	Bobby Valentino-Slow Down	]

So ya....today was the LAST DAY OF SCHOOL!!! heck yes!!! i sooo excited for summer.....i walked home with my girly Jamie Nicol Hocher....and hung out at her house....then went swimming (OMG the sun went behind the clouds when we go to the pool : 0 ) that makes me sooo mad bc we were going to get a nice tan yall!!!!.....and i have soccer tonight last practice ;( kinda sad.....but this is going to be the best summer.....Im going to florida....up north to my cottage and to megs (ya SWEET)....ceider point.....and spending nost my times at megs house....im sooo excited!!!!! thats all i have to say

*love*me*

9 days till florida.......im gonna miss you while im gone : (

HECK YES!!!! TOMORROW IS THE LAST DATY OF SCHOOL......AND I GET TO HANG OUT WIHT THE HOTTEST PERSON ALIVE...OH YES JAMIE HOCHER.... wow im a dork!! i cant wait......

     so ya summer is finaly here and "love is in the air" im just nervous bc i dont want what keeps happening to happen again.....but anyways i have a game tonoght at 8 how stupid is that on exam day!!

*love*me

[	mood	|	confused	]
[	music	|	lostprophets-last train home	]

well this weekend was soooo much fun....kenzi the relay 4 life thing was wonderfull haha emotional but fun ; ) we should just go next year just to go and see people!!! i didnt get much sleep....i got like 2 hours on saturday (bc the stupid 7th graders were sooo frekin loud at like 5 in the morning) i couldnt go to sleep bc they were yelling and then i had two games with thunder....we tired the first and then won the second...i had 2 goals ; ) and bc i can sleep in the car it was hard to sleep between the games....the only real sleep i really go all weekend was last night i got like 8 hours which felt good

Also this weekend i found out that a special someone is now single....but the only thing that kinda ticks me off is that i was just getting used to the fact of not having him and of him being w/ her all the time....i was finally HAPPY for once...im happy now but i dont want to rush into anything and then something bad happen and someone get hurt.....but w/e

today i was sooo tired though...school was boring as always.....i really wanted to satay home and sleep but my mom wouldnt let me...but i was sooo happy that soccer practice got cancled for today so i can go to bed early and try to catch up on some of the sleep that i missed!!! so that is wat im going to do now.....

p.s. 5 days till chicago....segs (meg) im sooo excited...its gonna be great to have u back

*love*me*

[

mood

|

mischievous

]

i've had soo much frekin homework bc my teachers are gay and didnt give me my homework when i got the homework request.....but today was fun...*Jamie-OMG!! gym....when i took ur glove so if it did rain ur hair would get messed up ;)....and at lunch....that kid, i think he really likes u haha....I HAVE NO PANTS ON!! haha.....i love u girl i dont know wat i would do w/out u!!

i really hope that it stops raining bc i have a cold and practiceing in the rain wont help me.....and this weekend better be nice bc im gonna be outside all weekend.....OMG meg i dont know when im gonna get to see u bc i wont be able to this weekend unless we do something on friday....we will have to get together over next week and do dinner and a movie.....

8 days tilll chicago.....meg it coming......oh ya and congrats caitlin this is  a great oppurtunity for u....im so proud of u!!!!!

*love*me*

[	mood	|	sick	]
[	music	|	hold u down-jennifer lopez	]

so ya...i had for games this weekend two on saturday and two and sunday....lightning tied, tied, and then lost.....and thunder won their game.....but i think the horrible weather is why i dont feel good right now..... saturday at the thunder game it poured the whole first half.....and then it was soo cold yesterday at the lightning games.....so ya that is probly the reason i dont feel sooo good.....iv been trying to rest so that i can go to our game tomorrow against Vardar....and if i do go i will just get sicker bc its sapposed to be really cold.....plus its at 8 at night.....

im sooo excited because there is 10 more days till we go to chicago....which also means 10 days till meg and caitlin put the blue and white jersy back on.....i have missed you too soo much you dont even know.....

one last thing.....Bryan.....im sooo happy for you and sarah......i really hope that things work out between you too this time.....i just hope that we can still be friends and things wont be weird between us ; )

*love*me*